Power Hungry Performance Forum - Prayers for a friend

Finally got ahold of Jason today. They're doing more testing on Friday and a spinal tap on Monday because they didn't like what they found with the MRI. Please keep him and his family in you prayers.

If you're up for a good cry or need a reason to be thankful, read on.

At 35 Life changed forever...

Author: Jason Goldstein

I was 35yrs old and thought my life was going great. I was married with two great kids. I was always healthy and very active. I did have headaches. Looking back my wife and I realized that the headaches went back 15 or more years. They were always severe and I always wrote them off as fatigue. In college too much partying or not enough sleep was always a valid excuse. A few aspirin and some sleep and they usually went away.

Then as luck would have it my cousin who was about my age had a brain tumor. All of a sudden my headaches became a concern. I went to my doctor who was positive it was nothing. He thought it was sinus related. After several months with no relief he gave up. I think he thought I was overreacting. I started to think I was being a baby too. He told me there was nothing more he could do and that I should go to a neurologist. I was reluctant but my wife insisted I go. Thankfully I listened to her. The neurologist said he was 99% sure it was nothing but to remove the 1% he ordered and MRI. I was not even going to go but my wife insisted. I went and forgot all about it after it was over.

A few days later I got a call at work. It was the day before my Grandmother's 89th birthday. The neurologist said he needed to see me tomorrow. I said impossible it was my grandmother's birthday and I didn't know how many more she would have, then he said the words that stopped me in my tracks. He said "you and your wife need to be in my office tomorrow morning, you have fluid on your brain and we need to discuss surgical options".

I froze. I said ok and went to web md to research. The only thing that came up when you put in fluid and brain was brain cancer. I was beginning to get hit with a ton of emotions. Would I see my kids grow up? Would I be disabled? I told my wife and I could hear the life get sucked out of her on the phone. She could not hold it together.

Thankfully I work for an amazing company. My boss told me whatever the neurologist said to let him know. The partners all sit on boards of hospitals and they would make sure I get the best treatment.

My wife and I did not sleep much that night as could be expected. We met the neurologist at 8:30 and before he said anything I asked if I had cancer? He said no but it just as serious. I did not know what hydrocephalus was. I had never heard of it. He drew me a picture of the ventricals and how they should look then he showed me my MRI. I felt chills going through me. My wife lost it. She was so scared. I cracked a joke. The neurologist said that a sense of humor could be very helpful in getting through this. He then told me it was very rare at 35 in fact he had only seen 3 other cases in his 20+ yrs.

It was Jan 5th he told me I would need surgery before the end of the month as the ventricles were about to burst. I came home and immediately emailed my boss. My wife started called neurosurgeon trying to get an appointment. I had to tell my parents, which was hard but I made sure they promised not to ruin my grandmother's birthday. An hour later my office had emailed me with the number of the surgeon who would end up performing the surgery.

My wife was trying to be strong and I kept her busy making arrangements. I will never forget when she called the surgeon and was told no appointment until late March and I heard her say my husband may be dead by then. Thankfully the CEO's name opened the door to him and I got an appointment the next day. He was a godsend. He told us to take our time and he would answer all our questions. We were there for more than hour. He reassured my wife as best he could.

This was Thursday he ordered the surgery for the following Tuesday. We left him feeling better but things were moving way to fast for my wife to get her head around. We went for a second opinion on the surgery. That doctor scared my wife to a point we nearly ran out of the office. We realized the first surgeon was the best choice for us and decided we were not going to keep looking but rather focus on getting through this as best we could.

That night at dinner for my grandmother it was very strange. We were always extremely close and I could not look at her, as she would know something was wrong. Through the whole night she kept asking what was wrong with Jason, I can tell something is not right. She wanted my Mom to tell her the truth.

The next problem was when and how to tell the kids. My daughter was 6 and she has always been Daddy's girl. We decided to wait until the weekend so as not to upset her for school. My son was only 3 and did not really understand what was happening. I told my daughter that Daddy had a booboo in his head and the doctor was going operate to fix it. I watched my little girl's life change in that minute. She turned white and looked at me and said "Daddy you can't die, you have to walk me down the aisle when I get married". My wife was standing in the door way and she began crying hysterically and for the first time so did I. She spent the next few days glued to me which I think helped both of us.

I didn't sleep much the next few days as I was worried about how my family would survive with out me. I was making sure life insurance was in order and health care proxies in order, it all seemed so surreal.

Finally the day of the operation came Jan 11 (my rebirth day). That morning we went to the hospital early in the morning and it all seemed to fly by. My wife looked so scared. My parents were scared. I have never seen my Dad scared of anything but he was that day. I was doing all I could to hold it together. When I was called to go in to get ready for surgery I said my good byes. I told my Dad that if I died to make sure my wife and kids were ok...I could see him start to lose it...My wife walked me in. She did not know what to say. I think she was in shock.

I remember the surgery was delayed a few hours and I made sure they told my family so they would not worry needlessly that I was on the table extra time. My next memory was in recovery I had made it. I told my wife she looked beautiful. My Mom's biggest fear was I would be brain damaged or not recognize anyone so I said to my Mom "who are you?" and winked...I still had my sense of humor.