For my children
 

The enevitable has come between their mom and I. Its gonna be pretty rough on them.

Kids can be quite resilient, Chuck. Remember the old advice to make sure they know it's not their fault. But even more, make a pact with your Wife to not play any kind of "blame game" with them. It is SO easy to use children this way, to try to get them "on your side". We're going through that right now with a family member and it's just terrible. Children should not have to "take sides". It's OK for them to love both of you - equally.

You're in my thoughts.

- Jack

Thoughts and prayers sent from SD

Lars

Thats the problem. I am like that and her and her mother ain't. They have already been coaching them. Even with what I have filed its a very liberal vistation schedule, so they do the only thing they thaught of and had the wifes aunt run off with the kids when we were in court for the OoP this morning. This is not my first rodeo with her, she had ran off with my oldest 8 years ago and I got custody and the Center for Missing and Exploited Children had to get involved. Comes to find out that what I had filed back in 01 is still active and I have to see a certain judge. First thing in the am I am going down and filling for emergency orders. To put icing on the cake they called CPS on me cause I would give the kids a swat when they needed it and to them it was abuse. The judge we had for the OoP asked her what was wrong with spanking a child and denied her claim. I am also going to request a physiatric (sp) evaluation and for her to go to mandatory counseling. She and her mother have the philosphy that women should stay home and not do anything while the men die working. So its gonna be a long up hill battle for me due to the false alligations and coaching but there are plenty of smart people that will have to be seen that will figure that out.

Sorry to hear about all that Chuck. Some people, for one reason of another have to get involved with playing the children against one side or the other. Children are smarter than they think, and in time, they often see things as they are. It's just wrong that adults have to stoop so low.
I think if they truly had the childrens well being at heart, they'd not do that, and reassure them that it in no way is it because of them and just be there to support them without taking sides.

Having gone through divorce with my parents, what meant a lot to me was that despite my dad not being there anymore, he made time to do the things that I wanted to do...even if he didn't. It showed that I mattered.

I'll certainly keep your situation in mind.

Been there done that in 2007. Their mom ran away with her boyfriend to MN left me raising two little ones on my own (9 & 4). It is a struggle but I tell them I love them and so does their mom.

They will sort out the truth on their own based on our actions.

I reccommend a GOOD counselor for both your kids. Best investment I ever made.

Keep your chin up. Send me a PM if ya need to talk

Thanks for the talk Jack.

You're most welcome! Hang in there Brother! Things ultimately sort themselves out.

- Jack

Well the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children are involved now and they are assisting me. It has not been a good week and a half but at least I have all my documentation in order.

I did have a problem with the PD cause they didnt want to enter into the NCIC because they said it didnt meet the criteria. I finally got a call on Friday and I asked the officer why it didnt because of the orders I got from the judge. He called me back in 10 minutes and said she is getting entered in NCIC. The NCMEC called and are going to be making flyers and contacting the PA's office to push a warrant through. Sucks its got to be this way but nothing I can do.

You can put up what I sent you. Thats all I can do legally at this point till I get in court.

No word yet on your daughters location?

Man I really am SO sorry to hear about this happening.

Nothing yet.:censored1:

Chuck, Sorry to see anyone having to go through this; and especially sad for the children. Though I'm a long ways away, I'll keep my eyes and ears open, and drop a few words with the big guy upstairs.
I hope this end soon.

Update
 

I was able to find and get my daughter on Tuesday. The school called me and told me they has a request for records and I went to that school and talked to the school resource officers and they verified the information. My ex showed up and threw a big fit saying that the court orders was reversed and then went on to say that she never knew about them (contridicting) then said that they wasnt any good from 2001. The officer asked her if she had anything that superceded what I had and she said no. I was standing behind the counter and was waving at my other children and she got real pissy and told my children not to talk to me and jerked the stroller that my youngest was in and went out the door. Now mind you that all of this is in the police report, and the officer stated that I was extremely compliant.

Her lawyer called me a bit ago, to set a meeting before court. He told me I didn`t have a right to pick up my daughter from the school like I did. I asked him why, he couldn`t answer, just I didn`t have a right. So I asked him that since he was a judge for 19 years if a signed court order was valid, he said thats beside the point. So whats the point, he said it had to with me medically. So I asked that since I have a kidney disease that I don`t have a right to my child, he said thats not what he is saying. I asked him what he was saying and he just goes well if you can`t figure it out now you will find out when we meet. I asked him if he had a copy of my medical records he said no, I asked him if he was a Dr. he said no. Then I asked how he could diagnose me. He was getting pissed at that point and I just told him that the mother could call our daughter anytime and she knows that but hasn`t. I also asked him if it was right for the mother to refuse me to see my children and he wouldn`t answer. And I told him that she wasn`t telling him the whole truth and he would be surprised when he has the documents in front of him. She claims that she knew nothing of the divorce, and thats pretty funny when she had to show up and give me my daughter at the court room.

Since this has happened they have called the police 3 out of the 4 days to come to my house and do a welfare check. The police come and see everything is ok and leave. Now mind you she is asking that I have supervised vistation. So my documentation continues. The judge might be a little upset cause I took my oldest and had to leave the other 3 but I am willing to let mother have contact with her but she is unwilling for me to have contact with the other children.

Chuck,

I don't know exactly what to say there. I am thrilled that you were able to locate the children but I can't even begin to imagine the suffering you are going through having to leave 3 of the children behind. As always, our prayers are with you.

Take comfort in knowing that in the end everything should be made clear and if there is still justice in the world, you will be with your children again. Just make sure you keep a calm head, treat your children right, and document EVERYTHING!

Good luck this week.